Someone asked: when we refuse to accept that something bad happened because of our own mistake, and instead blame others, or blame the weather and circumstances, just so we don't feel too bad about ourselves — does this habit affect our progress in Dhamma practice?

It certainly causes harm, because the unwholesome is what guides us into not seeing our own faults, making us see every fault as belonging to someone else, having nothing to do with us. Once we believe it has nothing to do with us, we make no correction or improvement, and the unwholesome then guides us into repeating the same mistake again and again, blaming this person and that person endlessly. Beyond keeping us from correcting our faults, the unwholesome uses this repeated pattern to keep drawing in demerit again and again, while also cultivating this bad habit within us.

This habit of blaming others eventually isolates us from people, because no one wants to stay close to someone like that — especially the people nearest to us, who are usually the very ones who care for and help us, the people who bring us genuine benefit. Unable to bear it any longer, they drift away one by one, two by two, until no one is left at all — not even family can stay close, no longer daring to come near, because whenever we face our own mistakes, we only find someone else to blame, over and over. As the trouble mounts and no one remains, we eventually turn to blaming ourselves — blaming the very food, the very things around us. Alone, we keep blaming whatever is nearby.

This habit keeps us from ever turning to look honestly at ourselves, because the unwholesome dominates the mind. Once the unwholesome dominates, there's nothing left to call Dhamma. Someone who cannot see their own faults will inevitably repeat mistakes in their work, their business, and their relationships with others. The unwholesome keeps overpowering the mind, continuously drawing in demerit without the person even realizing it, making them easily irritated with others — anger arises, creating trouble for both themselves and those around them. Once demerit is drawn in this way, progress in Dhamma practice becomes extremely difficult — there's only regression, because even while practicing to gain merit, any mistake that happens is still met with the same impulse to blame someone else. Practice not going well? Blame the location, blame the teacher, blame fellow practitioners — even the smallest thing becomes someone else's fault, because the unwholesome has taken hold of the mind at all times, drawing in demerit without stop. Once we associate ourselves with the unwholesome this way, it guides us wrongly, unable to accept even the smallest mistake in others, only ever finding fault with them.